My Almost First Indian Wedding

Ever since I first saw an Indian wedding in a movie, I've always want to see one in person. SO I was really excited when I was told that a close friend of my host sister's would be getting married this year. I went to her engagement earlier during my stay and in these past few days the wedding happened. Well not just the wedding, as anyone who knows the Indian traditions can tell you. Many ceremonies and gatherings happened starting 5 days before the wedding and I got to even participate in one.
Each Indian family and group has it's own traditions and one that is common is what is called Sangeet (which means music). Basically, it is a reaffirmation that the couple is engaged by an exchanging of rings and they eat cake. There is also a pooja between the groom and the bride's brother. Afterward, there is a performance by the close friends and relatives (and sometimes the bride and groom). I was asked if I wanted to participate and so I said yes, doing 2 dances. Okay I'll back up and explain. The bride and groom employed a choreographer to make a compilation of dances set to Bollywood songs to be performed. There were about 14 or so songs and I learnt the steps to 2 of them while other like my host sister, participated in many. Despite the fact that I wasn't quite sure I knew the steps all the way and ended up messing up the first song, the second song went fine and I was happy.
That was Saturday night and on Monday was the Mehendi party and pooja in the girl's home. There was a DJ, singer, and Indian drummers playing music while the bride and friends/family danced in a circle. Numerous times, people would circle money around the bride's head as a blessing and give it to her. She had already gotten her mehendi done earlier so all the other women were getting it put on. I was waiting for a call from my mom so I left a bit early, after having cake (of course) and but soon got a call form my host mom saying to come back up and see the banglewalla. I was interested and so I went. The banglewalla wouldn't make one for me but I atleast got to see how big clay bangles are made. Basically, the banglewalla had a big stick of clay on which he put the heated painted and after letting it cool, spread it out like a thin stick and then wrapped it into a circle (sorry I don't have pictures).
The next night was the wedding or, as I have mentioned, the almost wedding. No, there wasn't a runaway bride or a secret girlfriend. Instead what happened was that first we missed the entrance of the groom because I had homework to finish so we figured we would go later, which is a shame because I've always wanted to see the groom riding on the horse with the band and everyone dancing around them. So after we were all dressed up, we got there during reception (backwards from American weddings, I know). Everyone was eating or going to congratulate the bride and groom + family up on stage. We had been there for quite a while when I was told that the wedding wasn't going to take place until 1:30. In the morning. Well it just so happened that I of course had school the next day and in no position to stay up late (more on that later).
So we ended up leaving early, not without also going up to congratulate. Despite not seeing the wedding, I had a good time anyway. Of course, I was the only white person there and so there were some awkward moments but at the same time, I loved dressing up in my new kagra choli.




As I mentioned before, at this point in time I'm in no position to stay up late. You must be thinking for obvious reasons since staying up late means lack of sleep and you would be correct. In America, I rarely stayed up past 12 and still managed to get about 7 or more hours of sleep; if I go below that and have to go for school, I end up falling asleep in class. Due to stress because of projects and various other distractions, I've been staying up rather late recently, sometimes til 2 which has caused my work and concentration to suffer. Now, you must be thinking, why does it matter if you fall asleep in class there? You're not completing the program with the kids.
That's true but I'm still a student of the school and, since it's an international school, I can still obtain credits for graduation by attending. But you can't really pass a class unless you put in effort. Another reason for my regard towards my classes is my own respect for my school and fellow students. I'm attending one of the best schools in Bombay, not to mention India, on a scholarship. Plus how can I relate to my classmates if I'm not doing the work with them and struggling on common ground? I would rather be respected for trying and failing to keep up with my friends and classmates than to attend class and not do the work at all. Plus, all of my teachers are doing a big thing by giving me advice and helping me with time management to do my work and possibly change my schedule so that I won't be too stress with experiencing culture and keeping up with work. That's a big thing to have while on an exchange and I know it's a rare opportunity. Which is why I'm making the most of it :D
In other news, I recently switched my service project. Although I loved the kids that I went to see every week, I decided to move to a new project that is a Habitat for Humanity club at school. Being world renowned, I think it would be a good way to get involved and change some lives. Just your average service project aims :]
My dance class is going well. I started learning choreography last week or so but now I have a break since my teacher is going to be in her hometown of Agra for about 20 days for a wedding and some performances. While I'm a bit put out, it isn't too bad considering what happened last class. You see, I learned out to go around in a circle on my knees but because I'm not used to it, my knees got skinned up. Consequently we had to put antiseptic and some indian medicine on it. But somehow, the wound got infected and my knees feel super sore so it is a good thing I don't have class. Hopefully, it will get better soon.
Tomorrow's my mid-stay orientation here in Mumbai for the YES kids. Hope it goes well :] I'll update when it's over.

ANNUAL DAY!!!

So it's been a crazy week as we prepared for annual day. I know I've already explained a bit about it but basically Annual Day happens once a year and all classes participate in this huge production. Usually classes preform skits, dances, and songs but we actually put on a play this year. Well more like a musical. Anyway, class 11, my class did both an acting/speaking part and a dancing one. I was in the dancing section and it went well. No mess-ups, we just had to be scary zombie type things at the start and then turn into awake Mumbaikars dedicated to making a change in our environment. We're at the end of the show so it goes right into the finale where all the classes come on stage and we dance and clap.
You must be wondering who the strange looking guy next to me, my friend, and the other exchange student is. Well, he's none other than the famous bollywood star Shah Rukh Khan! His kids go to our school so he came to see the annual day performance. Right after it was over, we rushed into the audience to get the photo. The lady is somebody just getting his autograph so don't mind her. :]
Then today I went to a friend's house that was in the countryside for the day just to have fun. She's actually a close friend of my host sister's who goes to my school and all of their other close friends came along as well plus parents. It turned out to be a lot of fun! We played throw ball (like volleyball except you catch then throw) and football (soccer). They also played some poker and we generally just sat and talked, which is fun in it's own way. The house was big and very pretty, rustic type architecture that you would never find in Mumbai so it did provide a nice escape. Hopefully we can go for something like it again :]
That's all for now. I'll update again soon!

A quick point

I know I just posted yesterday but since then, I have something that needs to be said for everyone. Being an exchange student is hard and at times you face miscommunication and it disrupts your life for a while. I don't want to go into too much detail but this happened to me with my host mom and she heard a few things and I even got mixed signals.

Host families adjust a lot to you being in their home and you should always recognize that. But even so, know that you have adjusted so much to their lifestyle. Speaking out is also better or as my host mom says "be free with the family". If you have any concerns let them know immediately, even if it's not your nature around those you don't know so well. I know I'm the more quiet type unless I'm around friends but still, speak your mind. And lastly, be more realistic about your situation. If you feel you haven't been getting out enough, don't automatically blame your host family. Look at what's been going on around you while yu've been there, at events, etc. and see if there's been time for those things. Sometimes there wasn't at all. Maybe you did. But in any case, if you want to go out, ask your family to take you somewhere and stick to it. My German friend and I agree, in India especially, if you want something , it is you who has to make it happen. I wanted a Hindi class in school so I went to my coordinator multiple times. I wanted to take a dance class so I looked through the internet and newspaper to find one. In the end, you're experience depends on you and your perseverance so make the most of it. I know I have changed a bit over the past 3 months and I'm glad that I have developed this sense of will and hope it continues to grow.

So everybody, don't worry, everything's fine but think about what I've said. So many things affect you while you're in your host country but never be pessimisstic that it won't change. You yourself have to work hard and deal with it by yourself. AFS is there but it ultimately depends on you. So be strong, work hard, and put your heart into it. In the end, that's all that is expected of you.

Trainspotting

These past weekends were pretty hectic. My German friend came to hang out last Saturday and the next day we went to South Mumbai in order to do some sight seeing with other exchange students. In a way, it's not the best way to go see these things with other caucasians because... well people stare a lot. And ask you for pictures. And in the end, you end up feeling like a tourist in the city/country you live in which is exceedingly awkward.

But anyways, so when my friend and I got up, we took a rickshaw to the nearby train station to meet up with a boy from Belgium to go to south Mumbai. Trains can be crazy, especially during rush hour. Thankfully, it was a sunday and not too crowded in the morning. Actually taking a train isn't too bad, you just have to be confident in yourself. Well confident enough to push through the mass of people and watch after your belongings. Pickpockets are everywhere and while I haven't had any trouble, doesn't mean there isn't any.

We got safely to the Queen Victoria station and headed off. Our first stop was a quick drink at Cafe Coffee Day (kind of like India's Starbucks) and then this famous fountain which sometimes runs but not usually. And yes I don't remember the name. But it is very pretty. Then we walked for quite a while, passing through a church and a garden until we reached the Gateway of India. Oh and on the way there we passed a TV serial filming. I was kind of excited :] After taking the standard pictures of the Gateway, we went into the Taj Hotel to look around but didn't see too much as the ballroom was still closed because of 26/11. From there we walked a bit more to see the Leopold Cafe, another place hit by the attacks and then went to the Mahalakshmi area by train.

Mahalakshmi is actually named after the temple that it stays there and right next door is the Haji Ali, a durga of a muslim saint/priest? which many muslims visit. It was all really cool and at the mahalakshmi temple, we were given blessings by the priests. We had to go after that because I had work to finish so me, the German girl and Belgian boy took the train home. At rush hour, it was completely different, as I've said, packed to the brim. Besides being very late, we got home okay and I was able to finish my work. I actually had a project due the next day and had to finish putting the presentation fully together. All went well though and I got a 28/30 on it. Hopefully my luck will continue.

This weekend was even a bit more crazy as I didn't have school on Friday so I once again had a sleepover with my German friend. Then when we woke up in the morning we took a rick to Bandra with another german girl. Breakfast was interesting though because it was the first time in 3 months that I had eaten eggs. You see, my friend's host mom is kashmiri and so she's non-veg (meaning she eats meat). So since she offered, I figured I would have one. Once we got to Bandra, all three of us went shopping including street shopping for shoes. It's a little stressful but oh well. I got some nice things in the end. From there I was supposed to go straight to school and I tried but unfortunately I got lost while taking a rick. So I called my friend and ended up bunking to go to her house.

My friend has been bugging me for weeks to get my haircut so we finally went that night. When we got back we had pizza (with chicken so more meat) and her driver took me home. I was tired when I woke up but had to get up because the chairperson of AFS India, one of the reps for YES, and another AFS India employee came to visit my home for lunch. We talked about the program and such and they gave my host family a certificate of appreciation to my host family for hosting me. After they left, I went to hang with my friend again for some coffee with my host sister and an AFS volunteer before I went back to her house to grab my stuff from our sleepover.

I'm sure reading it, it doesn't sound as crazy as it was. One thing that I was happy about though was the amount of hindi that I was able to use during the weekend. And I also did need to get few things. Unfortunately, I forgot that my camera was in my bag during this so I have no pictures of it. But there are some of my area and of our sight-seeing.

In other news, I've started my dance class and it's going well. I'm learning folk dance from a lady in my area so I'll have to end the classes when I switch families. But so far I really like the. Well, except for one thing. Since it's usually evening when I go to see her, both of her kids are there. And because it's so hot in India, parents allow their kids to take off their pants when they're hot... under which there is no diaper or anything. It caught me by surprise the first couple of times but now I'm getting used to it. But it is weird to me. America would never allow anyone to do that and they would immediately become someone you didn't want to know. But here, even my host cousins do it and my mom won't say anything.

Last but not least is Annual Day night school. Some kids like it, some don't. I like it. Of course, it's tiring to be at school at night when you might've done something during the day but still. You get to hang around with your friends and do silly things. Some people are studying because SAT are coming up but other wise, thing's are pretty lax. Hm well have to go now, there's a long day ahead.

Diwali vacations= <3

So I've been on vacation the past week and thank goodness! It's been such a nice break from school although I was a bit bored for the first half. Most of the planning was to take place nearing the end of vacation which really should only be reserved for homework. And unfortunately, I'm still trying to change my un-adventurous ways and go out during the day by myself more often. So most days were spent trying to do homework and going to one of the chain coffee stores in the afternoon for more work (trying to do homework being the key word). My host mom and sister did go out in the mornings but I was never invited along or else I would've gone. Let this be a lesson: if you're bored and someone is going out, ask to go out with them. Maybe they'll say yes.

I did go hang out with my counselor on Tuesday. She lives in Andheri, a neighborhood close to my own so I took a rickshaw to meet her. I guess now would be the time to explain these neighborhoods. Basically, Mumbai is broken up into sections and each are named, but they are basically like neighborhoods. Mine is called Powai, and is located in northern Mumbai, where two lakes are. Some kids at school like to joke that we live in a village but really, where I live is a huge complex designed by Hiranandani, whom my host dad works for. The best way to describe it is that it's like those suburbs where every house looks the same except here, they're all apartments. In a way, it feels like someone took 16th street mall, stuck beige plaster on the buildings, set it down in India, and let them run all over it. But that's a really blunt description. The area is really pretty though and we don't have any beggars around, just slums (but I think there are slums everywhere in Mumbai).

So anyway, I went to meet my counselor to hang out in her house in Andheri. When the rick dropped me off, I wasn't quite sure if it was the right place but thankfuly it was and my counselor came to meet me with her boyfriend. From there, we went back to her house which was really close by. Anaka, my counselor, is south Indian so the area of buildings that she lives in is a south Indian community. Birds of a feather flock together right? Her home is also an apartment but she lives on the first floor so she owns a garden too (which is kind of cool considering Mumbai's space issue). Her dog is so cute though! I'm not sure what type it is but he's small, black with curly hair and she can convince him that there's a rat around so he'll chase after it. It's been a while since I've been around a pet dog so I had a lot of fun.

Anaka is an actress (theater) and she had to go to practice for a new play she was going to be in. So after we dropped her off, her boyfriend, mom and I went shopping for groceries in a supermarket. There are quite a few of these and most people shop for food here. After that, her boyfriend helped me get a rick home and it was quite late so I was hoping nothing bad would happen. Which nothing did but you should always be on your guard. My area is much safer than most places in Mumbai and India because we have guards at every entrance to buildings. But that doesn't mean that they are everywhere so you still have to be careful.

I did get a chance to hang out with my school friends in Bandra and we had breakfast at McDonalds. I never go to McDonalds in the states but I ike it here because... well, the food is so much better. There's no beef so no room for disgusting burgers. Just aloo tikki burgers :] I don't know if it's necessarily more healthy but it feels healthier and the chicken nuggets are also okay. So we all caught up (even though me and another girl were an hour late because of traffic) and two of my friend's little siblings were there (so cute!).

When it was time to leave, we thought it was a great idea to buy some ice cream in cones. Of course, from there I had to go meet Juhi and we decided I would meet her at this store that was a bit far from Mickey D's. So, ice cream cones in hand, my friend, her brother and I caught a rick to take us towards her house and the store. I don't think western ice cream was ever meant for tropical weather because soon enough, ours were dripping all over the place, including my friend's little bro's lap! It must have been a pretty funny scene: two girls and a little boy in a rickshaw trying too eat ice cream out of cones. By the end of it, only the top parts of the cones were left and we had to toss them on the ground whle in the rick.

I'm not necessarily proud of littering but that was just food, so in my eyes it was okay. But I do hate littering and make a conscious effort not to despite how supremely common it is here. Even at home, my host mom will just throw trash like packaging on the ground for the maid to clean up or people will leave wrappers lying around. But I will only put things into the trash can; it seems degrading to leave it on the ground for the maid. I really like my maids and not because they help to keep the room clean. In fact, because they move stuff around, it can be annoying sometimes. But both of them are cute (even though sometimes I don't understand what they are saying) and our cook is nice.

Diwali was this weekend though starting with visiting family on Friday. I went to see some relatives on the more northern side of Mumbai, a very gujarati community, which was very pretty and didn't feel like the city at all. I hung out with my host cousins, playing Uno and cards (which I'm very bad at) and after having dinner, we went to see Blue, a new movie touted as the pricest Bollywood film ever made. It was completely horrible. There are barely any other words to describe it and I'm not talking funny horrible.

The next day we spent preparing for a diwali party in our apartment and I got to wear one of my new churidars. I got to make diyas which are like candles. Basically you take cotton, roll it into long pieces, put oil into the bowl with some water, dip the cotton into the oil and light it. They're really pretty! And we also put food coloring into glasses and put oil into the with little threads things that you burn candles with... if that makes sense (oh! wicks, that's what they're called). The whole house was lit up. The party went nicely, with our building friends and some relatives attending it. One of the best parts was seeing our fireworks go off. I know that fireworks cause so much pollution and I hate how noisy they are. But I got to light one off and it was the best so there. :p

The next night we went to another party, a "kiti party". Basically all of the people who live in our building who are apart of my host parents social circle get together. It was a bit boring but the uncles and aunties are so funny and amusing that it became fun. My host sister and I left after we ate dinner. I should have done homework when I got home (at 12:30) and I did try to finish but... I didn't. Then yesterday I was supposed to hang out with my friend which never happened and ended up going to my nana and nani's (maternal grandparents) home and my aunt's home. I got to see my little cousin again and received some unexpected money. You see, during diwali, elders give the younger children money but I didn't expect any as I'm not a relation. But my nani did give me money in an envelope that said "America". Cute right?

Which leads me to today in which I'm just starting to finish my work after coming back from one of the German girls homes. Oh for woe is I :[ I'm really not looking forward to the next few hours.

Obama and Cockroaches

Part 1:
I found out yesterday while in school that Obama was given the Nobel Peace Prize for inspiring hope and change. I won't lie, my first reaction was "What?" because it came as a major shock. Not that I'm not proud of my president but that's a big accomplishment and he's only been in office 9 months. In a way, I don't think he should have gotten it just yet as he is still in office and hasn't completed all of his work. I believe he has inspired many people and that it is very good to have a person with a goal to improve the global situation in power. Basically, I think the award was given too soon and if, by chance, Obama does not succeed with his plans during his turn, criticism will be put upon him. Plus this just adds more pressure to his already packed schedule.
Still congrats Mr. President, we're proud of you.

Part 2:
It can happen at any moment. I go to the bathroom before going to bed but close the door quickly at the sight of movement. "Didi!" I yell and walk quickly towards the kitchen and the TV room where the maid looks questioningly at me. "Kya didi?" She asks and I reply, "Cockroach didi, bara cockroach." She gets the spray and follows me to my bathroom where we go about hunting down the buggers, me pointing and her spraying. And this hasn't just happened once, but several times although I'm still not used to it. The creepier part was finding a dead one on the floor of my room with a tiny baby ones surrounding it. Freaked out yet? Yeah I felt the same. Fortunately, it's becoming normal to me. Just another example of unexpected situations, I guess.

Aur Kuch (And More):
Well... I'm mostly use to life here now. At times, it can be frustrating especially with classes. I love my school, it's quite fun and all of my friends are really nice. But classes... trust me sometimes I wish I could bunk all the time. As I mentioned, since I've been put in one of the best schools in Mumbai, my credits will most likely transfer so I'm working hard to do well in class. But with some classes that's hard, specifically math and physics. In Indian schools, they start with the basics of Biology, Chem, and Physics much earlier than in US schools (like in 8th grade and earlier). This makes it considerably harder for me to get along and study when everyone has already covered the basics. So I'm diligently trying to catch up but also trying to complete other work it's all so... tiring. Then again, I didn't really go on this to relax, did I?

Diwali break just started for us and marks the end of Saturday school and 10 days of no school. Which is nice (excepting my load of work). Diwali is the festival of lights and so my family is decorating our flat for it. Diwali day is next Saturday and we are celebrating Friday and Sunday. For it, I have another chuni choli coming and am having two salwar kameez made, which I can also wear for the weddings coming up. Kind of cool right? I'm excited, especially to see all of the lights in the city. It will be almost like Christmas almost but in 30 degrees C.

A couple of days ago, one of the ladies in my building was holding a mehendi party because of a festival the next day. So I went down after doing some of my homework to have dinner and have mehendi put on. I've always like mehendi and I got to talk to the aunties from my building and my sisters' friend. Speaking of sisters, my older host sister has gone back to UK for school so now my other sister has the room all to herself.

Lastly... Annual day is starting soon so a week after diwali break, we will start having night school. Interesting right? No school during the day but practice at night... Hm oh well.

School, Ganapati, Goa, Navatri... phew

People aren't joking when they say that Mumbai is a fast city. And still despite that, it can take you an hour to get to the other side (sometimes 2). Living in the suburbs, of course is a bit more relaxed and where I am, you'll find quite a few foreigners. But the further into town you get, the more packed everything is and the taller the buildings get. But anyways, this isn't the subject of my post. Instead let's talk about school.

Being at school is fun. It's an IB school and is a lot like American schools except they go way faster here. I enjoy all of my classes and the teachers are all very nice. Like most schools in India, I have to wear a uniform to school of a striped blue button up shirt and navy blue skirt. As bad as wearing a uniform sounds, it is a nicer uniform compared to some others which make you wear a pinafore (dress) plus shirt and maybe a tie with your hair braided with ribbons. Get my point? But as much as I like school, I hate the homework that comes out of it. And yes, I do have to do homework since my school is taught in english (and I need credits). I would prefer not to since in most cases, homework is usually given when there is some Indian holiday. Like today is Daseera, in which Ravana is destroyed by Ram. And I have two essays to write and a case study plus trying to figure out physics and memorize the hindi alphabet. I don't know how I'm going to survive. Also I've been having saturday school because of swine flu vacation (we had a scare here a few weeks back) which basically also sucks.

As I mentioned previously, Ganapati occured a while back. Ganapati is a hindu festival celebrating the god Ganesh, remover of obstacles and one of Mumbai's most favored gods. I got to celebrate with my family and their friends in the building, going down for a pooja (prayer session) and going down to the lake near where I live for visarjan (after a few days of having the Ganesh idol, they submerge it into the lake by ceremony). The whole 10 days I could hear the beat of drums from the balcony and the streets were well populated with people covered in fuschia powder pulling wagons of ganapatis. I was also able to see some of the much larger idols being submerged in the lake on one of the last nights. It can be amazing to see, these huge plaster statues cover in flowers and color. And maybe a few hours after the sun rose on the last day, there were no drums at all.

As per stereotype, the traffic here can be very bad Indians always find someway to get through. Maybe it runs in the genes but if there is space between the cars, someone will find a way to fit between. Also because the speed on the roads isn't as high as in America, seat belts are not required in the back seat, only in the front. I cannot count the times I have reached for a seatbelt only to be looked at weird. I've gotten used to not wearing one now but every so often I'll end up reaching. By now I've been in a rickshaw plenty of times but have just now started to be able to get my self home in one. I usually take the bus to school (which sucks. Imagine going over a pothole every 5 mins at 15 mph. not fun) but sometimes I have to stay back or am late to school so I take the rick. It's actually convenient and cheap despite the anxiety that the driver might not know where to go or even finding an empty one.

A couple weekends ago I did go to Goa for a nice vacation. We stayed at a resort with 40 other family friends and I had a good time although I didn't end up going to any of the touristy spots. We swam in the pool though and I got a small tan. And the festival Navatri or Durga was this past week too. Basically it's a dancing festival and you dance dandiya (couple dance by hitting sticks together... it's hard to explain). I got to go once with a group of AFS people and as well at school on Friday, when we had Indian-dress-as-you-like. By now, my teachers and classmates have figured out how much I like dancing and as my english teacher says," Annah, you're Indian." yeah.... What can I say? I'm here for a culture experience so why no participate? :]

I've also been to quite a few parties lately (another thing Mumbai is notorious for). On saturday I went to two birthday parties and was suitably tired on Sunday (which was yesterday). I stayed awake though because that night I finally got to go see a movie in the theater (I've been seeing ones only at home :[). Despite all of the good reviews, I didn't like it that much but it was nice to go anyways. A friend from school and I are planning to go see a movie that already opened soon and it looks good.

So it seems I've been very busy and I admit, it is a change of pace. Hopefully, I'll get into the vibe of it.

If you want to see any of my pictures, please go to: annahoverly.myphotoalbum.com